When I shop for everyday clothing, I rarely try things on. Exception: jeans and bras. But things like shirts, and dresses—I can just look at them and know whether or not they will work on my frame and whether the size is correct. I’m not sure how I’ve developed this talent (perhaps the years of shopping and mounds of clothes I’ve accumulated alongside my shopaholic mom?), but…it works for me. If I were to give a completely unscientific estimate of how often a piece I don’t try on doesn’t fit/work…I’d say less than 5%. I have a pretty good eye! As it is with most clothes, I had a pretty good idea of what style of wedding dress would look good on me and what wouldn’t. Despite being a plus-size bride, I’m very proportional for my size and have a smaller waist. I’m lucky because I’m 5′10″ and my height balances my size. I do have larger hips, so I know I want to “cover those up” (i.e., I won’t be going for any mermaid gowns!).

Other than that, I had an overwhelming feeling that A-line or modified A-line gowns would look the best on me. Here’s the other kicker: I want lace. I’ve known I wanted a lace wedding dress since I was a little girl, and with a lace-themed wedding…I mean, I wanted a lace dress. No, make that needed a lace dress. (If we add some tulle in, I may love it even more…)

Now ladies, I’ve heard horror story after horror story about plus-size wedding-dress shopping. So I called up two of the more “upscale” bridal salons in Calgary, hoping they would have more diverse sample sizes. I made appointments during a weekend my mom came up specifically to dress shop. I didn’t want to go with Fiancee Eagle (she went without me and I haven’t seen her dress!), and I didn’t want to go with my bridal party just yet. Why? Because I was scared of looking like a fool if none of the dresses fit me.

The first bridal salon we went to, The Bridal Centre, had me try on about six dresses in my street size. They didn’t fit (big surprise, since bridal sizing is notoriously small). At this particular salon, they are all about service and “the experience,” which I liked. But they remove the designer tags and replace them with their store tags. They also do not allow photos until you’ve purchased a dress. Annoying. While their selection of plus-size dresses was good, their selection of plus-size A-line lace gowns was…zero. I also felt like even though my budget was in their “top tier” of price points, they continued to put me in dated, matronly gowns. Do couture plus-size dresses just not exist?!

However, I did try on one dress at the Bridal Centre that I am considering: Maggie Sottero Embrace. I love the ivory over light gold color combination. (How do I know what dress it is? Because I am sneaky like that and know the Maggie dresses pretty well. Their tag-removing ways couldn’t have fooled me!)

Embrace by Maggie Sottero / Images via Maggie Sottero

The only thing was: the sample was a good eight sizes too small, and the satin underlay for the dress wouldn’t get over my birthin’ hips. (Yup, that’s right—I admitted it. I have birthin’ hips.) The lace overlay was fine and the top gave us the general idea…but I still couldn’t see what it would really look like if it were in my size. And at $2,000 with the dress needing serious alterations to the bust (because the dress would be in a size to accommodate the hips)…I just wasn’t sold. I didn’t say yes to the dress.

The next bridal salon we went to, Ethos Bridal, also had a very good selection of plus-size gowns. But their selection of plus-size A-line lace gowns? Zip. Nada. I had a very sweet consultant who was very very sensitive to the plus-size situation and didn’t let me even look at dresses I couldn’t try on. It was nice of her, but the reason I booked an appointment at Ethos was because they carry Pronovias dresses. They have hundreds of beautiful lace and tulle A-line dresses. These are the type of dresses I’ve dreamed about since I was little!

Berlin and Bermeo by Pronovias / Images via Pronovias

And they had them at Ethos! But in a bridal six. Needless to say, the consultant knew what she was doing and actually got me in a satin dress I liked: Mori Lee Julietta 3093. It isn’t a dress that looks ANYTHING like my beloved Pronovias dresses, but the shape looked really good on me. Unfortunately, again, no photos.

Julietta by Mori Lee dress 3093 / Images via Mori Lee

Needless to say, while I really liked the bling on the top of the dress, all I could think was, “This would look really good on me, in lace.” I didn’t say yes to the dress (again).

All in all, I liked going to the bridal salons and trying on all the different styles and getting to try on veils…but I didn’t find my dress. I didn’t even get to try on the dress style that I wanted. However, it was confirmed that A-line silhouettes and sweetheart necklines do flatter me (my clothing intuition was correct…shocker!) and that I’m not into pick-ups on skirts. And seeing myself in satin dresses just further confirmed that I want/need lace. So, I feel like I’m back where I started. I began dress shopping wanting an A-line lace dress, and finished shopping also wanting an A-line lace dress (possibly even more than before).

We’ve got less than eight months to go until the wedding, and I need to get on it! I need a dress. Dresses take six months to order and two months to alter. As both The Bridal Centre and Ethos Bridal told me: I needed to have ordered my dress like yesterday. But I still can’t seem to commit to ordering a $2,000 dress (+$600–700 in alterations…) without being able to really try it on. That’s a lot of money that I don’t necessarily want my mom to spend.

Are you a plus-size bride, too? Did you find dress shopping difficult, or did you luck out and find your perfect dress? Has anyone seen plus-size Pronovias dresses in store?

This article was originally posted onWeddingbee.